americaeffyeah:

I need this on my blog.

oh hey grandpa, it’s that guy who kidnapped your soul and then tried to kill me. but now he’s our friend. :D

magsley:

sociallyawkwardgiraffe:

Ellen: People were already lining up for tickets for the new Twilight movie “Breaking Dawn”. I think I know why. I’m not sure if y’all know this, but I am in the movie and I guess it’s leaked out and that’s why people are lining up. I’ll show you a little sneak peak.

I hate Twilight but goddamn Ellen I love you

whatevertheheckles:

shonenwarrior:

jesus

This would be terrifying without the narration.

It’s hilarious. XD

the-milk-eyed-mender:

zaboo:

thisgingersnapsback:

That look of disapproval from the anti-porno man is priceless.

ahaha I love this.

justin and i chillin

seriously though black-sign-man, i feel you.

ayubutts:

moleculees:

Kawaii.

omg

yes

chinesesleepchant:jesseseisenberg:

#pattinson #stop it #one day i’ll actually have to say i like you #and someone will think it’s because of twilight #quick #do something good so i have a well-known excuse

#there is a whole army of secret rpatz fans who hate everything he does professionally but loves everything he says outside of his actual work

pers0na:

shanabanned:

redqualls:

nevheera:

LONG LIVE THE KING

vondell-swain:

aperture-dragonfly:

chantilly-lacey:

johnlaughingalonewithnicolascage:

topherchris:

pleatedjeans:

I was a pretentious tumblr post for Halloween.

WE ARE INFINITE

best costume

best person award

omg

good

shawarmageddon:

FYI - Currently eating a Cinnamon bun drenched in syrup.

gemeaux:

queercakes:

chic-chibi-chica:

wethinktherefore:

didyoudance:

homemadedarkmark | devonwood:

MY ANACONDA DON’T WANT NONE if you say no, because I respect your boundaries.

‘CAUSE I’M LONG, AND STRONG
AND I’M DOWN TO GET THE FRICTION ON as long as it’s okay with you. otherwise I’m good with a movie and some tea.

SO LADIES, LADIES, IF YOU WANNA ROLL IN MY MERCEDES please let me know ahead of time so that I can plan accordingly

BABY GOT self-respect

OOH BABY I WANNA GET WIT YA, AND TAKE YO PICTURE because you really have lovely eyes

EVEN WHITE BOYS GOT TO SHOUT I love spending time with you.

I’M TIRED OF MAGAZINES SAYIN FLAT BUTTS ARE THE THING because I don’t appreciate mainstream media dictating standards of beauty and desire